I am not sorry for writing my previous post, in fact I felt a whole better. Fast forward to less than two weeks from now, I have two term papers to be handed in for which I have zero percent of my essays constructed and realized. I can’t explain the laidbackness,  akin to how my current life routine is.

People have said and commented on what an anti-social I have been, how boring is my life, why and how I can manage such a lifeless life, but I beg to differ. As much as I don’t socialize anymore, I’m quite happy at my current state. I spend more time with my books, my music, my parents and my two furballs which is contenting.

Notice the absence of I spend more time with Hugo in the latter sentence, truth to be told I haven’t been seeing my so called boyfriend for quite some time let alone talking to him. Apparently he has been sucked into the vortex of toil that he has neglected me. I’m fine that he’s busy with his work, I understand because I myself am busy with my studies as well, so there goes the lack of communication there BUT, yes a but is always there.

But, when I am the one who’s currently having a period; full of hormonal rage and change, with additional strain from my quest for earning that piece of paper that they call a degree plus my equally full of hormonal rage and change of a mother, he is the one who’s throwing tantrums around while I’m the one who goes all the way with “Yes dear”, “Don’t stress dear”, “Take care, chill” and whatever crap I can say to comfort him. Responding with total pessimism and downbeat replies, my mood in the conversation went from fine to just pure annoyance.

I was at a point where I had to ask the essential question of  “what the fuck is wrong with you, if you have a problem you can just tell me”. His reply was, “Nevermind, ignore me”.

WTF?

Sigh, the amount of sighs I sighed because of this is so staggering. Could this be a sign that this relationship has run its course? It feels like so, I don’t know. The timing he chooses to strike a conversation with me is always bad, he would always call me during dinner time which obviously I am having my dinner whereby I have to rush to answer the phone, or if I couldn’t answer his calls he would send me stern messages with proper spelled english like “call me when you are not busy thanks”.

Honestly, this stress is totally unnecessary but what to do, humans are complicated by nature.

On a good note, I got my credit cards today! Nothing to brag about la, just that it feels so surreal that I have my very own plastics.

Another thing, my dad and I talked about how life has been lately, I can see that he feels very thankful for having his colleagues and ex-staffs like Sindy, Ming and all the people from his company being so supportive and caring. He seems pretty happy lately too, with the occasional sneers from my mum that he’s being all dramatic about his sickness.

♥ Wendy